When I was growing up, my parents had this quiet, unconventional wisdom, though I’m not sure it was intentional, or if they even recognized it as wisdom at the time.
Simply put, they let me quit. If I started something extracurricular—piano lessons, volleyball, Brownies (ugh)—and later decided I really didn’t like doing it, I was allowed to stop. There was no guilt trip, no forced “you have to finish the year” talk. “No, you made a commitment” lecture.
If I really didn’t like going, that was reason enough to stop.
And I wasn’t bouncing from one thing to the next like a leaf in the wind. I loved skating and practised for a long time. I excelled at drama and fell madly in love with dancing. I just didn’t feel pressure to push through something that didn’t feel right.
This was, I came to learn, very different from what most of my friends experienced. Many were taught to stick it out, to follow through, to prove themselves by staying. Even if their hearts were quietly crumpling in the corner.
Quite a few people I’ve come know—and many who find their way to my painting retreats—still carry this heavy thread. They stay in jobs or roles that drain them, sticking with what’s expected, what’s ‘safe,’ what looks good on paper—long after the joy has gone missing (if there ever was any to begin with). They stay put, they stick it out, some to the point of soul sucking.
In this case, I believe quitting is a radically powerful act of self-love and trust.
Quitting taught me to honour that quiet nudge inside that said, this isn’t it anymore. It helped me tune into what felt alive, what sparked my mojo and made me feel most me. To this day, quitting something doesn’t make me a failure—it makes space. It makes room for alignment, for joy, for the kind of creative energy that can’t be faked. It’s what led me to the work I do now, which I truly love. And yes, sometimes that meant leaving behind perfectly “good” things that made sense to other people.
So this is my wholehearted defence of quitting. Because when you give yourself permission to leave what doesn’t feel right, you create the possibility of discovering what does.
And thank you, Mom and Dad. Intentional or not, you taught me to honour what lights me up—to know when to walk away and when to leap.
Love,
Laura xo
“There is freedom waiting for you, on the breezes of the sky. And you ask ‘What if I fall?’ Oh but my darling, what if you fly?” — Erin Hanson